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Discipline Not Abuse

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I thought this is a nice short clip on disciplining children.

I want to share some useful discipline methodology which I have learned from Sunday school (My husband shared these tips with me). I find them particularly useful with my own students. 🙂
– Maintain eye contact when you are talking to the kids.
This ensure that (1) you have their attention, (2) they can “see” and “read” your face and (3) that they “know” you are not talking down at them.

– Try to squat instead of bending down to the same level during the conservation.
– When kids do not behave, do not ask them to go back to their room. ( The time-out place should not be their room or their comfort territory).
– The time-out place should be a safe place in the house where there are no toys and where the kids do not like to be in.
It can be a simple corner in the house where the kid will have to stand for a period of time.

– Let the kid know the time he will be placed in the time-out zone. (a guide can be about 1 min per year. Eg a 10 year old will have a time out period of 10 min )
– Let the kid know what is expected from him at the end of the time-out, ie an apology or participation in some activity.
– PRAISE and ENCOURAGE them for any little effort they put in. All children ( in fact, even us adults) loves to be praised ; )
– DO NOT BE AFRAID OF CONTRONTATION.
Although I am all for non-violence towards children, however, I still believe in the idea of Mr Cane. (perhaps due to my Asian blood, Hee).

Mr Cane should be used in situations where all time-out and reasoning doesn’t work and should only be used on their legs or bums.  Caning should only be carried out by parents.
I remembered my dad and grandmother caning me when I was young. ( up to Primary 5. Hehe. Quite embarrassed to admit that i was quite a mischevious girl who likes to throw tantrums when being corrected).
I was probably too young to realise it was wrong or I was just being spoilt and being a nuisance.
The caning, especially from my dad, drew boundaries for me.
I have never blame them. In fact, I am pretty grateful to them for teaching me to differentiate right and wrong behaviour at an age where I am not capable in doing yet.
Thank God, they did not over-do the caning such that I do not feel their love for me.

Children will always test our limits.
They do not realise that our patience is as deep as our love for them.

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